20 things I like but am deeply ashamed of liking

Posted by on Dec 29, 2013 in Essays | No Comments
20 things I like but am deeply ashamed of liking

Things I am interested in / like but don’t know why / feel shame for being interested in / liking:

1 Britney
2 The “Now I speak Mandarin” lady in the Rosetta Stone commercial
3 Wall Street jerks
4 Weight loss success stories
5 Oprah
6 That game show that is on after Colbert about the internet
7 Miley
8 “how to be happier” / “more productive” psychobabble
9 Martha Stewart
10 Those ads with the hockey player who reads (badly) off a cue card about the device he uses for his feet and legs in a thick French Canadian accent: I actually un-mute the TV to watch them, and absolutely HAVE to imitate him afterwards, even if alone.
11 Funny animal videos
12 James Franco
13 CP24 Dance Party Fridays – why can’t I look away? I always hate myself afterwards.
14 1 Girl 5 Gays – awful, has jumped the shark, and actually hurting LGBTQ people by presenting us as idiotic sex-obsessed nitwits, yet I watch.
15 The Little River Band
16 NOW – reactionary 20 year-old hipsters who hate and are against everything except smoking pot and Olivia Chow. Yet I keep reading.
18 Humming “Mainstreet” by Bob Seger EVERY TIME I pass Main Station on the TTC
19 Toronto Life – I often think to myself “I hate the people that read this magazine”, while reading it.
20 “How The Lottery Changed My Life”. I once watched three episodes in a row, followed by an existentialist breakdown.
21 Internet lists

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